maybe if I kept up with blogging I wouldn't feel quite so hopeless sometimes. like right now, where I feel like my only real friends are a bajillion miles away... which I guess in a sense is true, my best friends are ridiculously far away. but whatever. I just feel really lonely all the time.
I want fall semester to start so that I have something to do with my brain other than think... thinking causes the weird ass dreams like the one I had last night about sperm donor... and it keeps me from thinking about friendboy.
speaking of friendboy... who the fuck does that to someone? I mean seriously. way to kick me while I'm down. I didn't trust anyone and I was 8 months pregnant and still let him inside my bubble and then he does that shit to me... what the fuck. the worst part is that he keeps poking me on facebook yet he won't talk to me. I have the urge to send him a text saying "what's going on? you can engage in a fb poke war but can't say hi?"... but I'll look pathetic. not to mention we're pretty sure he has a girlfriend. he wasn't "ready for a relationship" with me, but now he's ALWAYS with this girl? what the fuck ever. seriously.
you know that saying "if you don't use it, you lose it?" I lost it. lol.
in other news: I'm a hottie. and we met some army officers on saturday at the hoppy monk and one of them has the hots for me... he text me yesterday and I never text back, I totally forgot until a little bit ago, he's going to think I'm ignoring him. he's soooo hot. lol.
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